'I say no to disrespect': Rebecca Lim won't let you push her around any longer

There are 3 things on Rebecca Lim'southward mind. The beginning is her sense of self and personal growth. Rebecca ii.0 is non the same equally the fresh-faced ingenue you lot may have encountered when she starting time started in the industry 14 years ago – a point she made clear multiple times over the course of our chat.

"The Rebecca at present is a little bit more than difficult to get along with than the Rebecca when she was 19," she said.

One never doubts a indicate fabricated in the third person.

The second is that she does non appreciate or take the fourth dimension for foolishness. Not from you, not from duplicitous colleagues, non from boys who desire her at their convenience, not from light-headed children who think they're superstars only because the camera'due south pointed in their direction for now. This is a woman who is done grin through your insensitivity, vanity and thoughtlessness. Yous can continue playing any ridiculous game you lot have in your caput that you're mistaking for strategy – Rebecca knows what you're up to, and y'all tin can accept your 2-flake act somewhere else.

The third is the futurity. This 33-year-old is in it for the long haul – not as some famous pretty girl who takes a good picture (she didn't ever, in any instance), but every bit an actor, thank you very much.

She may have her insecurities, she may have residual hang-ups well-nigh having been a "chubby kid", and she may have auditioned three times for Crazy Rich Asians and lost the part to someone who's now part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe – only information technology'southward all adept. Rebecca'south programme for career longevity is simple: Work hard, work on your craft, and work on being the best version of you.

And if yous have a trouble with that, you can refer to Point 2. Why? That would be Indicate i. How? Welcome back to Betoken 3.

Oh, and 1 more thing. Rebecca doesn't think she looks proficient without her dress on.

NEVER THE Beauty QUEEN

I starting time met Rebecca when she was fresh out of Inferior Higher. She was looking to kill time before starting academy, so she entered the Miss Universe Singapore pageant in 2005. She didn't win. In fact, she barely got her name on the call sail in the showtime place. Her blood brother had but passed his driving exam and was eager to get behind the bicycle for whatever occasion, including dragging his sister to her destiny.

"I went totally unprepared. Y'all were supposed to take prepared a portfolio. I didn't accept anything – I had my Inferior Higher IC photograph. For the swimsuit, I simply went with a 1-piece," she admitted, giggling at the retentiveness. "I was on 8 months holiday. I thought, 'Afterward these eight months, I'k going to the United kingdom of great britain and northern ireland to written report medicine.'"

By the time every name was called and every cheek was air-kissed, Rebecca was crowned beginning runner-upwards. Office of her "prize" was to model Swatch watches alongside the winning queen for a sponsor-associated interview in eight Days, where I spent two years as a disgruntled employee. My chore was to squeeze some sort of story out of ii fresh-off-the-gunkhole pageant girls – and to help the photographer get i proficient picture of these kids who were terrified at the notion of doing their very starting time photo shoot with a mag.

"Oh, that was terrible… I was very scared," said Rebecca, looking a fiddling embarrassed when I told her I had in fact popped her photo cherry. "I was simply basically listening to instructions and taking them very literally."

She still remembers the lensman telling her to pout for the photographic camera – she too nevertheless remembers proceeding to frown like a half-dozen-year-old in pigtails who has but been told she won't be getting fish fingers for her teatime snack.

I call back telling my colleagues virtually it.

Years after, that lensman told her, "'You are the beginning person in my career who did a literal pout,'" recalled Rebecca. "'Not a model frown. But a literal, distressing frown.' I actually didn't know what was going on."

Rebecca wears a printed silk-chiffon ruffled clothes by Chanel. Jeff wears a wool turtleneck pullover and wool trousers, by Ermenegildo Zegna; J12 ceramic and steel watch by Chanel. (Photo: Aik Chen)

Fourteen years later, the very same photographer was shooting Rebecca again for this slice, CNA Luxury'due south first digital cover story. But this time, she clearly knew what she was doing, drenched in the latest Chanel finery.

Some celebrities suck upwards all the air in the room. They relish existence the center of attention, holding fort over the ready, well-nigh gratified by the flashing lights and free fawning courtesy of an inner court of sycophantic hairstylists, make-upwards artists, managers and other assorted handmaidens. Rebecca is dissimilar. She's quiet because she's listening to management, thinking about how to go far work for her confront and body. She'southward focused on getting the job done well.

Information technology's a work ethic that applies to everything she does. Sometimes that quiet concentration on television shoots can be mistaken by colleagues for aloofness. Rebecca knows she tin't change people'due south minds, so she lets her work do the talking. "If you don't know who I am, I'grand going to let my work show you who I am," she said. "That'due south why I place a lot of accent on my craft and my job, as opposed to me going out, hanging out after work and all that."

This steely resolve is somewhat of a coping machinery to survive the amusement industry – an environment she never actually thought she'd be part of, what more than rise to the A-list of. Experience, she said, has made all the divergence. That and "full acceptance of yourself – the skilful and bad".

"Why is it that imperfections are not beautiful? Do we need to achieve the stage where everybody looks the same?"

"Information technology was a process… Putting yourself out there, learning from scratch," shared Rebecca. "I grew upwardly in a very sheltered environment. I had a very loving family, I'thou comfortable, I didn't have to work… Just a very comfortable Singapore child. Only when I was thrown into this industry, information technology wasn't something I expected."

Information technology didn't assist that she started her career wearing a sash and a smiling. "People come into this industry thinking that information technology'due south very glamorous, and that [joining Miss Universe] is a shot to fame, that this pageant groundwork is going to give yous a huge stepping stone," said Rebecca. "Just, in fact, it was actually a stumbling block instead of a stepping stone because people already take this preconceived notion of who you are. 'Oh, you lot are just a beauty pageant contestant.'"

Interesting note: Rebecca mentioned her Miss Universe Singapore experience several times during our conversation – just she never used the words "beauty queen" to draw herself. "Contestant", information technology seems, will practise just fine.

"Existence in an surround where I'm not nether the shelter of love… Existence in an surroundings where I take to succumb to criticism – effective or non. It's a position where you don't know what is going on and you accept to larn along the way."

"Even now," she continued. "I'm nonetheless learning every day."

STICKS AND STONES AND REMEMBERING WHO You lot ARE

Information technology's a tough manufacture to navigate – one where anyone tin can say annihilation about you, sometimes to your face. "Most of the time to your face," Rebecca corrected me, laughing.

"When I came into this manufacture, people were like, 'Why are y'all not wearing any brand-up?', 'Why are you always in the same jeans?', 'Don't you lot have any other clothes?' But I'm like, "What'southward wrong with that? They've been serving me well for the by 10 years!" she said, laughing.

For the record, she however has those jeans, which she recently had shortened to more stylish proportions. She yet uses the Longchamp nylon handbag her grandmother gave her when she was xviii. She still owns the simple cross pendant her other grandmother gave her earlier she passed away. Part of information technology has to exercise with practicality – but Rebecca is also sentimental. She admitted to attaching meaning to things. She still prints out photographs and brings them along with her when she travels, "only to make information technology a trivial bit more like domicile".

That'south the balance she's trying to strike: Having to intendance about "things that yous thought were not so important" but are essential to the career she's chosen while belongings on to who she is as a person. She'll practice what the job requires – but she's increasingly defiant about having to "conform".

"Why is it that imperfections are non cute?" said Rebecca. "Practise we need to attain the stage where everybody looks the same?"

I recollect we're already there, I offered. Swipe through the famous faces on social media and it's pretty clear this train has arrived at Clone Station.

"We're about there," said Rebecca. "Only why practise nosotros need to get at that place? For everybody to have the same cheekbones, for everybody to have the aforementioned optics, for that to be cute. That's something that took me a while to accept – to accept who I am, physically."

Wool-lined leather-effect romper with back flap collar and crinkled calfskin belt with embellished logo hardware, J12 ceramic and steel lookout, all past Chanel. (Photo: Aik Chen)

Information technology seems her perceived flaws well-nigh her body are key to both her insecurities and her determination to rise above it. "Even every bit a chubby kid, my mum would always tell me how cute I was," said Rebecca. "She'd buy me miniskirts… I look dorsum at all these pictures and I'm like, 'Why did you lot fifty-fifty permit me to exist in a mini-skirt with these thunder thighs?' And she'southward like, 'Because… y'all liked it.'"

"I understand that because of who I am and my genes, unfortunately, my weight fluctuates quite a bit," she said. "The offset thing I take to tell myself is to non be too hard on myself. If I do balloon during a production, it's fine. As long every bit I'chiliad salubrious."

It might be cocky-preservation, she confessed, but it's a healthier mindset to have than to force-fit herself into some templated glory mould for no other reason than "just because".

"Why must yous always conform to what people expect of you?" she asked, rhetorically. "In this industry, there is always force per unit area to wait movie-perfect all the time. And I've come up to accept that at the end of the twenty-four hours, when the camera cuts and I get abode, I'yard a human being. I still take my life outside of work. It'south okay to be homo."

Yes, she understands she's just a cog in the star-making machinery and cannot singlehandedly change the rules of the game, but she insists on playing her role to resist losing herself. "And it's so easy to conform. Every day y'all experience pressure to conform," said Rebecca. "But you have to be really solid and stand up firm to say: 'This is what I'm going to exercise. Like information technology or non.'"

SWIPE LEFT ON BAD PEOPLE

The industry and the people in it were conspicuously on Rebecca'southward mind. Even when the conversation fabricated a detour to the sideroads of fashion and fashion (I go distracted by pretty things), she steered it right dorsum to the topic of unpleasantness.

What, I asked, was the hole-and-corner to looking confident when it comes to way? Her respond surprised me.

"The thing is, you can clothing the most fashionable, expensive piece of habiliment – but if you have a terrible heart and a terrible listen, I really believe that any you think and who you are as a person shows on your face up. In Chinese there'south a cheng yu (idiom): Xiang you xing shen. Which means your face reflects whatever is in your heart."

She asked if I understood that cheng yu. My level of proficiency in the language, withal, is tied with a turnip's understanding of string theory. "Roald Dahl said it equally well," offered Rebecca, referring to a passage from The Twits: A person who has expert thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can take a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double mentum and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they volition polish out of your face similar sunbeams and you volition always look lovely.

"Don't be nice to someone just because y'all want a long career. It'south just bones respect for another homo. You don't treat someone differently considering this person is a CEO."

I pointed out that there seemed to be a theme running through our chat. "Mmm hmm," she replied. Is it getting better for her, I asked. "Yep and no." She said she's learned to carve up the dissonance from what's real – and she's learned that the hard mode. "Through experience, getting injure. Even past people who y'all idea were truthful friends, who you idea had your back."

"Sure incidences in and out of work life caused me to see that you may exist doing something for this person, and you may expect that loyalty, or expect that reciprocation – only y'all cannot expect that of someone else. You do it out of your own will," said Rebecca. "And then when I practise something for somebody… I don't look information technology back in return. That's something that has helped me a lot."

"Sometimes people go very bitter," she connected, admitting cryptically. "When people kickoff to get bitter, they wallow in self-pity, and that's non who I desire to exist. I think mental health is but every bit of import – if not more of import – than physical health."

Famous people, it seems, aren't in a higher place getting sucked in by the same gossip us non-famous folk read about celebrities – even when it's almost them. Drama inevitably ensues. Only if you read some gossip about you and some other celebrity that you know isn't true, I asked, wouldn't y'all just text the other person and clear the air?

"Y'all'd have to ask them," replied Rebecca. "If something inaccurate is said about me or someone else, I settle it privately. That has always been my style. If I'm involved in any drama any, I've never been the ane who goes out to say, 'I'm the victim.'"

"I'm never one to make a big deal about pocket-size, little issues. Or want everything to turn out my manner. Or desire everybody to exist on my side. I believe that people volition take sides, naturally. And no thing how much y'all endeavor to stay out of drama or be nice to people, in that location will be people who don't similar you. And then, I take that fully. I just motility on with my life," said Rebecca.

"If y'all actually want to put on a front, there's only and so long you can do that for before someone sees through all this fakeness. Considering how long tin can yous continue up the act for? Acting is a tiring chore – how tin can you do information technology 24/7?"

Which brings the states back to the point we started this story with: Rebecca 2.0 is not the same fiddling daughter she was when she beginning started out – and she will not let you to button her or anyone else around any longer.

"I say no to disrespect. Disrespect for people on set," said Rebecca. "I get very frustrated, specially when I meet the younger generation [of artistes] being disrespectful. I get very angry. I'll put my pes downwardly and say, 'Don't speak to someone like that only because this person is of a "lower status".' Everybody is working together. And don't be nice to someone just considering you want a long career. Information technology's but basic respect for some other human existence. You don't care for someone differently considering this person is a CEO or a client."

"Simply treat everyone with respect and do your job well." No truer words have ever been spoken, in my stance.

That, to me, is what makes Rebecca unlike from many starlets, influencers and precious wannabes in the manufacture: She knows what her job is.

Rebecca Lim is an actor who is famous – she does not hunt being a celebrity who also happens to act. And that'southward a major distinction. Focus on your craft, she said. "I feel that everything else comes naturally after."

"I want longevity. You don't focus on climbing up the ladder. That can get yous up there apace, just how long can you lot final?"

She's been exploring international productions, returning for a 2nd season of HBO Asia's The Bridge in early 2020, where she plays a weathered detective. She also auditioned for Crazy Rich Asians three times – and ultimately lost the role of Astrid Leong-Teo to Gemma Chan. Had Rebecca gotten the function, she would have played unhappy wife to fellow Mediacorp alum Pierre Png in his Hollywood debut.

"I recall I did really badly with the emphasis," admitted Rebecca, laughing sheepishly. "They asked me to do an American accent… Maybe they wanted an accent that sounded posh. I probably sounded similar the other extreme!"

That said, her goal isn't to work on international projects per se – it'southward to work on quality productions. "I want to explore everything. I'chiliad not averse to whatever roles, except nudity and love scenes," she said, explaining that she must go along her family's feelings nearly risque roles in mind, before quipping: "Also, I'm not a pretty sight to see without clothes on." Insecurities don't vanish but considering you want them to.

Rebecca'southward focus is on an actor'due south long game: Knowing it's all about the work.

"It could exist a very practiced quality Singapore product – that could accept yous places also." When casting directors come to town and enquire to see the all-time actors we have in the country, Rebecca wants her proper noun to exist "in the top five". "I'm working towards that," she said. "I want to be on that list."

"When it comes to my career, I desire longevity. Longevity in your career ultimately [comes down to] your talent," said Rebecca. "You don't focus on climbing up the ladder. That can get yous up there quickly, but how long can yous last? I may have longer than others, but that's fine."

She'll practise it with grace, respect and hard work. As well every bit the cheekbones and eyes she was built-in with. And that'southward beautiful.

Shot on location at Wallich Residence. Manner Editor: Serene Seow; Fine art Direction: Chern Ling, Jasper Loh; Photography: Aik Chen; Stylist: Daryll Alexius Yeo; Pilus: Dexter Ng; Makeup: Shaun Lee; Manicure: Rebecca, Fluttery Tips; Model: Jeff, Mannequin.

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Source: https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/people/rebecca-lim-254296

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